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  • Hawkeye: War isn't Hell. War is war, and Hell is Hell. And of the two, war is a lot worse.
  • Father Mulcahy: How do you figure, Hawkeye?
  • Hawkeye: Easy, Father. Tell me, who goes to Hell?
  • Father Mulcahy: Sinners, I believe.
  • Hawkeye: Exactly. There are no innocent bystanders in Hell. War is chock full of them - little kids, cripples, old ladies. In fact, except for some of the brass, almost everybody involved is an innocent bystander.

M.A.S.H