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Loneliness does not come from having no people around you, but from being unable to communicate the things that seem important to you.


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Demarco and Lister, in their famous Coding War Games experiment, demonstrated just this - the best predictor of quality for programmers, they found, was not years of experience or salary but rather how quiet their office environment was.


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Something I explained to my 12 yo: When you're a little kid, your parents create your environment. Then there's a second stage where your peers do. Then for ambitious people there's a third stage where you create your own environment by choosing your own peers.


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Taught 8 yo a rule of thumb for avoiding cults and cult-like things: Avoid groups that tell you not to talk to your family.


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Little kids emulate big kids, but it works the other way too. Nothing makes a 6 yo try harder to do something than a 3 yo who can.


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Having multiple kids makes it clear how much is nature vs nurture. How much momentum character has. At best you can steer it.


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It's depressingly common to see parents staring at their phones while pushing their kids on the swings. Distraction addiction.


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Instead of pushing my kids, I try to help them find the interests that will pull them. History suggests pull has more power.


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Was explaining to my 7 yo the dumb things teenagers do, and realized most are caused by caring too much what their friends think.


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Something I taught my kids last night: Everyone has something they're unusually good at. When you meet someone try to figure out what it is.


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One of my tricks is to treat them like adults intellectually. It's remarkable how often it works. Adults talk down to kids way more than they need to or even realize.